We have KIDS

Ok, so it is a long complicated story. Let me backtrack a little. Last week we were told that we had been selected for an abandoned baby born in January. It wasn't for sure, but they were going to proceed with paper work like it was. So we had several appointments and got to work. We were very excited, an infant. Then on Thursday we got a call asking if we would provide respite care for a 2 year old and 1 year old. (Respite care is when one foster family baby sits for another) We had said we were not interested in doing that, but due to the swine flu and so many kids being out of school respite providers were is short supply. So we agreed, and over the weekend we kept the kids and had a really good time. When talking with the foster mom, I found out that they were up for adoption, they had already been matched with another couple, but it fell through because of the adoptive parents choice. When it was time to leave the 2 year old wouldn't let go of me and it broke my heart. I was so conflicted, we had been matched with the infant and we were so excited, but we entered this process wanting a sibling group. So Sunday night was terrible, we went to Tim and Amanda's for dinner, along with Evan, Jenny, Kris and the boys. Everyone was telling me that either choice would be a great one, but I just could not find a way to decide. How did I decide I didn't want someone. I felt like I was rejecting someone. So Monday Spencer and I talked and talked and we agreed we needed to see it through with the baby. We had agreed to take her and given our word. I just couldn't stop thinking about those 2 kids, I felted retched. I had asked for prayers that the decision would be clear, and it just wasn't I kept thinking about it. Monday afternoon I got home from work and got a phone call. She was the CPS case manager for the kids we kept. I FREAKED! I just knew that they had ended up with a bruise or something and we were going to be stripped of our license. She asked a lot of questions about the weekend, my panic was growing. Then she announced that on Friday CPS had chosen us to be the forever home for those kids. She had only learned that afternoon that we had babysat over the weekend. That was all we needed, these children were meant for us, and I immediately felt a peace. We removed our name from the infants case, she will have a wonderful home and there are so many people looking for an infant.

So, we will have a meeting in the next few day to set up the time frame and get the process started.

Thanks for all the prayers, support and encouragement, especially in the last week.

A big thanks to friends willing to come clean my house while I sit on the phone and share good news.